In January of this year my 3 kids sat me down and asked me to divorce their shitty Dad. That was a real punch to the dick. I was doing the whole “stay together for the kids” thing, like I kept hoping things were getting better.

Nope, turns out my future ex-husband is an emotionally manipulative tool. Shocker right? But because he’s a dick face I’ve been sleeping on the couch since January and it’s just hella awkward at my house.

I want out, but that requires me to pay for some shit.

So now I’m making some shit, from the heart, and hoping you like it enough to make it your shit and then I can afford an attorney because therapy was a big waste of time.

(Turns out, future ex-husband didn’t know that you should “listen with the goal of understand.” Yeah, it’s that bad. Eventually even the therapist just said I needed to get out.)